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Die Ouer Dame

Ouer Dame: Is daar 'n probleem, offisier?Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?
Offisier 1: Dame, u het te vinnig gery. Officer 1: Ma'am, you were speeding.
Ouer Dame: O, ek sien. Older Woman: Oh, I see.
Offisier 1: Mag ek u lisensie sien asseblief? Officer 1: Can I see your license please?
Ouer Dame: Ek sou dit graag vir jou gee, maar ek het nie ene nie. Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.
Offisier 1: U het nie ene nie? Officer 1: Don't have one?
Ouer Dame: Ek het dit verloor, vier jaar gelede ... vir dronk bestuur. Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.
Offisier 1: Ek sien... Kan ek u voertuig registrasiepapiere sien asseblief. Officer 1: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.
Ouer Dame: Ek kan dit nie doen nie. Older Woman: I can't do that.
Offisier 1: Hoekom nie? Officer 1: Why not?
Ouer Dame: Ek het die kar gesteel. Older Woman: I stole this car.
Offisier 1: Gesteel? Officer 1: Stole it?
Ouer Dame: Ja, en ek het die eienaar vermoor en is stukke gekap. Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.
Offisier 1: Jy het wat? Officer 1: You what?
Ouer Dame: Sy liggaamstukke is in plastieksakke in die kattebak as jy wil sien. Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see.
Die offisier staar die vrou aan en rittereer stadig na sy kar en roep vir rusteuning. Binne minute is daar 5 polisie karre omsirkel haar. 'n Senior offisier stap nader na die kar, met sy een hand slaggereed op sy rewolwer. The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.
Offisier 2: Dame, kan u asseblief uit die voertuig klim! Die vrou klim uit haar voertuig. Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle.
Ouer Dame: Is daar 'n probleem meneer? Older woman: Is there a problem sir?
Offisier 2: Een van my offisiere het my vertel dat u die kar gesteel het, en dat jy die eienaar vermoor het. Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.
Ouer Dame: Die eienaar vermoor? Older Woman: Murdered the owner?
Offisier 2: Ja, kan jy asseblief die kar se kattebak oopmaak. Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.
Die vrou maak die kattebak ook, en daar is net 'n leë kattebak. The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.
Offisier 2: Dame, is hierdie u kar? Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?
Ouer Dame: Ja, hier is die registrasie dokumente. Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.
Die offisier is heel verbaas. The officer is quite stunned.
Offisier 2: Een van my offisiere eis dat u nie 'n bestuurslisensie het nie. Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.
Die vrou grawe in haar handsak rond en trek haar beursie uit en oorhandig dit aan die offisier. The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.
Die offisier bekyk die lisensie. Hy lyk heel verward. The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.
Offisier 2: Dankie dame, een van my offisiere het my vertel dat u nie 'n lisense het nie, dat u die kar gesteel het, en dat u die eienaar vermoor en in stukke gekap het.Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.
Ouer Dame: Ek wed jou daai leuenaar het jou ook vertel dat ek te vinnig gery het. Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.
Moenie met Volwasse Dames Mors nie. Don't Mess With Mature Ladies.